Sight unseen

It’s rather remarkable to have someone feel the need to inject their opinion about the course of your life and which path you’d be better served to pursue. Such has been the case with an individual whose counsel I once sought several years ago when facing a difficult situation. Admittedly, Charles (for the sake of reference), did provide direction that proved quite beneficial at the point I’d inquired. I took heed to his advice and followed through with a series of recommended actions that ultimately led to amicable resolve in that particular instance.

But why is it that if a person has ever been asked to share his views on any matter concerning the circumstances governing your life, they feel justified taking it upon themselves to be a part of every subsequent decision making process? According to his beliefs, there’s no longer a need for extension of an invitation before becoming engaged in your business.

It would seem that any and all boundaries suddenly dissipate to the point they become non-existent and the individual simply has free reign to explore every intricate detail of issues once considered out of bounds. Since the informal inquisition that transpired so long ago nobody really remembers the specifics related to the matter, Charles has more-or-less assumed the role of an elder sibling and actually expects that he should be kept in the loop regarding all matters life related. The thing he seemingly can’t grasp is the fact that issues relative to my life are just that…mine.

In such cases, people will often take offense when they perceive you’re purposely excluding them from the act of making significant decisions about activities transpiring in your life. During a recent conversation, Charles noted he’d been made aware of the fact I had undertaken the task of preparing to publish a second fiction novel this summer. It honestly came across as his being a little disrespectful when he began what I perceived as scolding me for not having consulted him regarding the matter.

Considering the fact that Charles was once a relatively close acquaintance but life mandated we move in different directions, I couldn’t help but inquire as to how he reasoned a choice I made could possibly have any significant meaning within the sphere of his existence. That, coupled with the fact none of the finances required for production, publication, and marketing the novel would be required of nor solicited from him, I frankly, couldn’t see where decisions about my life journey were any of his business anyway.

Naturally, Charles took offense to the position I held which prompted a grave deterioration in both, the nature of our conversation and the status of our relationship. The unfortunate situation lingered, honestly, for a couple days until realization smacked me in my head. Conclusion surfaced that life’s journey won’t include everyone you meet along the way. Some people simply pass through without regard to your destination while others’ might travel a greater distance but still won’t tag along for the entire journey.

It’s important to know that not everybody is capable of going where you’re headed in life, so it becomes of vital importance to recognize the things, people, and circumstances that are hindering your growth. Not to suggest anyone is any better than anyone else, but reality dictates the basic principles that while some will; most will not.

Because what the Lord intended for you in the realm of gifts and talents are yours; that means everybody won’t be able to see them. Chances are, it will be very difficult for others to fully grasp the manifestation of who you’re to become as the vision doesn’t belong to them; it’s yours. I could be wrong but it’s just something to consider.

To pose a question or share your opinion, you can reach B. G. Howard at or P. O. Box 8103, Jacksonville, FL 32239.