Dick Yarbrough
Irreverent but loving tributes to two men who marched to their own drums
I love a great sense of humor, no matter what its source. That includes obituaries. Joe O’Connor, a Great American from Marietta, shared with me a couple of eulogies he thought I might enjoy reading. I did and I deemed them too good not pass along — edited for length but preserving their spirit.
According to the obit of O’Connor’s close friend, Gary Edwin Sutton, of La Jolla, Cal., he was “a troublemaker and a man full of integrity, class clown and a brilliant businessman, ruthless when crossed and a generous advisor to everyone who leaned on him, a risk-taking adventurer and a mushy family man, a C student and a lifelong learner, a healthy fitness buff and a wine lover, a small town farm boy and a big city sophisticate.
“Always a writer at heart, Gary authored numerous business and fiction books, some of which were actually published by legitimate publishing houses (all are available on Amazon, but buyer beware!) He also ran many columns and Op-Ed pieces in publications ranging from the local fish wrapper to the Wall Street Journal and New York Times. One column helped a judge decide to overturn a jury verdict. Another caused a CIA operative to show up on his doorstop. Death threats and nasty letters to the editor followed several pieces. At least that’s what he claimed — Gary was never one to let the truth get in the way of a good story.
“Despite loving being the center of attention, Gary did not want to have a funeral or memorial service. We are debating about looking skyward, saying ‘You are not the boss of us!’ and going against his wishes, but plans are still to be determined. Gary was suspicious of most charities, so there’s no need to make a donation in his name. If you wish to honor him, please spend time with your precious families and realize that you may not have as many tomorrows as you’d like.”
And then there is this tribute to Frederic Arthur (Fred) Clark, of Richmond, VA, “who had tired of reading obituaries noting other’s courageous battles with this or that disease, (and) wanted it known that he lost his battle as a result of an automobile accident on June 18.
“True to Fred’s personal style, his final hours were spent joking with medical personnel while he whimpered, cussed, begged for narcotics and bargained with God to look after his wife and kids. He loved his family.
“Fred’s back straightened and chest puffed out when he heard ‘The Star Spangled Banner’ and his eyes teared when he heard ‘Amazing Grace.’ Always an interested observer of politics and amazed at what the voters would tolerate. His final wishes were ‘throw the bums out and don’t elect lawyers’ (though it seems to make little difference).
For the complete column pick up your copy of The Baxley News-Banner on newsstands today or CLICK HERE to Subscribe.
“Always a writer at heart, Gary authored numerous business and fiction books, some of which were actually published by legitimate publishing houses (all are available on Amazon, but buyer beware!) He also ran many columns and Op-Ed pieces in publications ranging from the local fish wrapper to the Wall Street Journal and New York Times. One column helped a judge decide to overturn a jury verdict. Another caused a CIA operative to show up on his doorstop. Death threats and nasty letters to the editor followed several pieces. At least that’s what he claimed — Gary was never one to let the truth get in the way of a good story.
“Despite loving being the center of attention, Gary did not want to have a funeral or memorial service. We are debating about looking skyward, saying ‘You are not the boss of us!’ and going against his wishes, but plans are still to be determined. Gary was suspicious of most charities, so there’s no need to make a donation in his name. If you wish to honor him, please spend time with your precious families and realize that you may not have as many tomorrows as you’d like.”
And then there is this tribute to Frederic Arthur (Fred) Clark, of Richmond, VA, “who had tired of reading obituaries noting other’s courageous battles with this or that disease, (and) wanted it known that he lost his battle as a result of an automobile accident on June 18.
“True to Fred’s personal style, his final hours were spent joking with medical personnel while he whimpered, cussed, begged for narcotics and bargained with God to look after his wife and kids. He loved his family.
“Fred’s back straightened and chest puffed out when he heard ‘The Star Spangled Banner’ and his eyes teared when he heard ‘Amazing Grace.’ Always an interested observer of politics and amazed at what the voters would tolerate. His final wishes were ‘throw the bums out and don’t elect lawyers’ (though it seems to make little difference).
For the complete column pick up your copy of The Baxley News-Banner on newsstands today or CLICK HERE to Subscribe.
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