My wife works for a company that requires her to travel often and it turned out she had to make a trip to Thomasville on the next Saturday morning and be there early to train a new hire. She asked if I would like to accompany her and that if I did we would go on Friday afternoon, go out on a date at a fancy restaurant and spend the night, sort of a mini-honeymoon. I do not like her to travel so much but there is little I can do about it and I could tell she wanted me to go with her so I agreed, and besides, it’s not often we get to go anywhere together overnight without the kids.
She was to work in Alma the Friday before so she packed all her gear Thursday night and had it sitting by the door. She told me to be ready when she got home around 2:00 p.m. and we would throw her stuff in the car and take off.
I cleaned the house Friday morning, washed clothes, dusted, vacuumed, washed windows and drapes, watched the stories and made preparations to be ready when the little woman got home. A man’s work is just never done.
I realized that I needed to make a trip to the grocers so our grown children would not starve while we were away. After grocery shopping, I saw I had time to go by the drug store and catch up on the gossip. While there I told my druggist friend I was planning a trip with my wife overnight and he said ‘let me give you something new to try out since you are going on a mini honeymoon.’ He gave me a tiny pill, winked, and said it would take about three hours to make its way into my system and that it would make my ‘comb’ turn red.
Men are dogs. I almost made it home before I decided to take the ‘miracle pill’, figuring what the heck. It’s almost time for the little woman to be home and by the time it kicks in we’ll be in a hotel in Thomasville. It’s only one night and we are married and there is nothing wrong with a little spice now and then.
I did not know the ‘miracle pill’ was one of those nuclear, super dooper 36 hour deals, and wouldn’t you know it, the little woman was late. Instead of her planned arrival time of 2:00, she didn’t make it until 6:00.
We were backing out of the carport when my ‘comb’ started turning red.
I didn’t make it to the end of the driveway and we never made it to Thomasville.
I’m buying some stock in that pill company.