Columns - Topics from March, 2012

Old dogs and new tricks
Because I wanted to sew for my dolls when I was a child, Mama taught me and turned me loose with her old pedal-type sewing machine. I made pajamas, dresses, rompers, coats, and hats and undoubtedly had the best-dressed dolls in Hazlehurst. We discovered that I had a flair for sewing and I enjoyed it. Soon I moved from sewing for my dolls to sewing for me—skirts and dresses galore. No pants, of course. No well-bred young lady of the ‘60s wore those. I made prom dresses and even a wedding gown for my sister. Mama’s early instruction paid off well because I made most of her clothes from the time I was twenty. I very much enjoyed my sewing talent until I did all the sewing for my sister’s wedding. The flower girl’s outfit was fun, but after the second bridesmaid’s dress, I was swearing. Fortunately, I’d done the wedding gown first.
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Hiss and crew at The Still
I visited my Mother, a very special lady, last Saturday morning. This is a ritual and years ago I would have expected a huge breakfast of grits, eggs, sausage, bacon, toast, biscuits, waffles or pancakes. I mean a feast, brother. This was standard fare for many years but time has taken its toll on all of us. I do not require such nourishment now for if I ate like that at my age I would weigh 400 pounds and Mother is no longer physically able to do the things she used to do. Make no mistake, if she gets it in her mind, she can still issue commands and you darn well better snap to it when she cracks her whip. She will be 88 this November and she is still a beautiful lady. I got my good looks from her side of the family.
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Life aboard a cruise ship
There is something to do 24/7 aboard a luxury liner. Food is delicious and abundant. Because cruising is an international experience, the fare on the ship is an international experience. On the food bars and menus, cuisine from many countries is offered and prepared by some of the best chefs in the world. Whatever you have a taste for is probably available. You can dine casually in a relaxed atmosphere, eat hamburgers, hot dogs and pizza at poolside while listening to “hoedown” music, order in your stateroom, or dress up formal and be treated to fine dining in a stylish setting with a brass band to entertain while you enjoy a variety of delicately prepared dishes.
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Where in the world is Afghanistan and who is your senator?
Sometimes I hear the name of an Arabic country and become frustrated with myself because I can’t call up an instant mental map with that country on it. My geography skills are weak, but I recognize my weakness and work to improve them. When I am working on American geography, watching the weather channel helps me recall the states up around New York and those mid-western states that I have trouble remembering, but countries—well, that’s another matter. Usually the evening news reporters talk about foreign countries and show maps to help us locate them. Apparently they know how weak we Americans are in this area. I guess I’m not the only one.
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The fabulous Cayman Islands
Grand Turk in the wondrous Caicos Islands is exciting, glamorous and fundelicious. With exotic cuisine savored to a Calypso beat in a remarkable beachside setting, Grand Turk will charm you into a genuine Caribbean mood. B. J. and I enjoyed our visit there almost to the maximum. We gathered seashells from the adorable beach only to discover that we could not bring them aboard our elegant ocean liner, the Westerdam. Disappointed, we deposited our pretty seashell collection on the dock before boarding our cruiser.
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Texting and shooting just don’t mix
After a morning bird count, I decided it was time to call the shoot at a local field for that afternoon. It was short notice but I managed to get commitments from several avid bird hunters like myself. During all the flurry of calls, my daughter, Jesse, overheard and asked if she could go. I was delighted and readily agreed. She asked if she could call some of her boy pals and I agreed again. The texting began in earnest as her little fingers worked the keyboard of her iPhone to a hot lather letting her buds know there was to be a shoot. Since school was out, she had no trouble getting takers. I busied myself gathering the necessities; guns, shells, swivel buckets, blinds, camo, and warm clothing. I had to show Jesse how to work her Mom’s 20 gauge 1100 Remington, as she was used to the 410 pump I bought her several years ago when she was much younger. Of course, all this flurry of activity did not go unnoticed by Fox, the Chocolate wino Lab. He was beside himself with excitement and began barking to let me know to include his flask of antifreeze. I told him no, naturally, and reminded him that drinking and retrieving don’t mix.
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Counting my blessings
We had a whirlwind visit with the whole family this weekend, and a hectic, fast visit is much better than no visit. Calvin and Julie and the boys arrived from Atlanta after midnight Friday night, and Josh and Bentley, coming from Virginia, rolled into Baxley even later than that. Naturally, today when Julie told the boys it was time to go home, they weren’t ready. Grandpa and I weren’t either. Spring Break’s not too far away. Maybe we can wait that long, but we aren’t certain.
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Tree farmer
My Daddy left for the Douglas Fishing Club and told me to take James Graves, tractor and seedlings, and plant a twenty-acre field of Slash pines. ‘No problem’, I thought, ‘I get to be the Boss Man.’
Everything went well until James and I took a break and he suggested that since it was Friday afternoon and cold, it would be nice to have a sip of store bought wine to fight off the chill and drudgery. Since I had never had a taste of store bought wine and was a bit fatigued and cold, I agreed. James had a driving license so we took off to Ambrose with two dollars and bought two pints of King Cotton peach wine at Myrtice’s juke. [Full Story »]
Everything went well until James and I took a break and he suggested that since it was Friday afternoon and cold, it would be nice to have a sip of store bought wine to fight off the chill and drudgery. Since I had never had a taste of store bought wine and was a bit fatigued and cold, I agreed. James had a driving license so we took off to Ambrose with two dollars and bought two pints of King Cotton peach wine at Myrtice’s juke. [Full Story »]

News from Rep. Tommy Smith
March 5 through March 9 brought a busy legislative week where some innovative pieces of legislation were voted upon and passed for the people of Georgia. The culmination of the legislative week was on Wednesday, March 7. This is known as crossover day, which is the last opportunity that the Senate and House of Representatives have to send each other their own bills. The General Assembly is scheduled to recess on Wednesday of this week, March 15, and reconvene on Monday, March 19, for the 34th legislative day. This means that at the end of this week, only seven working days remain until the 2012 regular session concludes sine die.
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“Nothing wrong with it”
Friday evening found Larry and me in Brunswick. We made a quick trip to the doctor to see what condition Larry’s condition was in and then the car automatically headed to Belk’s. However, I got sidetracked and turned into Ross’ instead. Inside I found several items I wanted to try on. As I went into the dressing room, a pretty young lady about 13 or 14 went into the room right beside me. Her arms were more heavily laden than mine. After trying on all my pants and shirts, I decided I didn’t like anything and headed for the door. As I handed the 5 items and the ticket with the big 5 on it to the dressing room monitor, the young lady stepped out and said politely to the monitor, “Can I go show my mama this outfit? She wanted to see it before I buy it.”
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It ain’t funny!
I try to keep humor in most of my stories but sometimes it’s hard to do. Often the condition of our country occupies all my thinking and I can find no humor in it. This is one of those days.
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Doing the Zumbah
The staff at St. Marys Magnolia Manor is all-creative when it comes to contriving mischief for the chaplain. They love to see me come in because they know that they will have someone to pick on. There is never a dull moment at St. Marys Magnolia Manor. The latest “thing” they have yoked me into is a dance called the Zumbah--pronounced Zuuumbahhhh.
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News from Rep. Tommy Smith
In previous legislative reports, I have dealt mainly with economic issues facing the state. This week’s report, however, centers on a major social issue that is often in the news and was addressed by the Georgia House last week.
On Wednesday the House approved legislation known as the Fetal Pain Bill. A large part of the afternoon was spent debating this issue. If passed by the Senate and signed into law by the Governor, it is estimated that over 1500 healthy babies would be saved each year in Georgia. Other states have put into law the same legislation, and so far there have been no objections by the courts, according to Right to Life proponents. House Bill 954 received 102 votes. This was 11 more than needed for passage. [Full Story »]
On Wednesday the House approved legislation known as the Fetal Pain Bill. A large part of the afternoon was spent debating this issue. If passed by the Senate and signed into law by the Governor, it is estimated that over 1500 healthy babies would be saved each year in Georgia. Other states have put into law the same legislation, and so far there have been no objections by the courts, according to Right to Life proponents. House Bill 954 received 102 votes. This was 11 more than needed for passage. [Full Story »]
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